Monday

When I got to the hospital they had a sitter with dad. But I don't think it really mattered. He seemed out of it. He was talking about things I didn't understand. I am praying that this is coming from the Haldon they have him on. I am going to try to get the doctor to change it to something else. How can I best decide on what to do for dad if he is out of it all the time?

I know people mean well when they say this is something everyone goes through and they get through it. Ok, I know I am not the first person to look after a sick parent. HOWEVER what most people don't understand is I am going through this TOTALLY ALONE. I don't have a brother that is helping me -- in fact I haven't heard from him in months -- I don't have a husband/boyfriend, or even an child to go through this with me. I go to the hospital alone, talk to the doctors alone, try to make life altering decisions for dad alone. I leave the hospital, go to dad''s house to take care of his cats and to pay his bills, alone, and worse still I come home to my house alone. It's just me and the cats.

Yes I know you can't do any more than pray and I understand that. But please understand every thing I am having to do/take care of/whatever when it comes to dad I am doing alone.